The natural human response to the death of someone you love is grief. Usually, grief is experienced as a process. Being in process is making changes through a series of steps or actions over a period of time.

Some of your steps in grief will be small and you might not even notice you are moving forward. Other steps will be bigger and you will recognize them as turning points. Eventually times will come, as you take action in your grief process, when you know you have changed and are feeling better (I know this may be hard to believe right now).

Because the process of grief happens over an extended period of time it actually becomes a journey. The “journey of grief” is a phrase often used to describe the experience of grief. The word journey has positive associations for most people because the end of a journey is usually good. Ending a journey commonly means you have arrived someplace you sought to be or you have returned home.

The journey of grief is an important life process for anyone. However, everyone experiences their grief and feelings differently. There are as many unique ways of grieving as there are people on the planet. Your way through grief will be uniquely right for you.

You may have heard the saying, knowledge is power. In the experience and journey of grief, however, I believe knowledge is comforting. I hope it comforts you to know what you might generally expect in grief during this time of loss. Hopefully by returning here often to read new postings and comments from other grievers you can get the information you need to begin or continue your grief journey more easily.

Right now it is important to know, as you take steps in your unique process of grief, there will be many twists and turns & ups and downs as you begin/continue moving forward in this very important journey.

Sincerely sending you Peace & Love,

Tricia

Feeling overwhelmed and anxious while grieving is natural and happens to many. It is an uncomfortable experience that can escalate and frighten you. It can incapacitate you, cause you to loose confidence, and prevent you from functioning very well.

Symptoms of feeling anxious may include taking shallow breaths and breathing too fast. You may not be able to keep your mind and body still. You could feel ungrounded and want to “take flight”. While you are anxious you might have difficulty eating, sleeping and being patient. Being anxious is not a good feeling, especially over a long period of time.

Taking in slow and deep breaths can help relieve anxiety and move you from feeling anxious to feeling calm. Let me guide you in a breathing exercise using color.

If possible find a place where you can sit or lie down comfortably. If this isn’t possible you can certainly do this exercise where ever you happen to be.

As you breathe, take a second or two to feel the anxiety within you. Now quickly associate a color with what you are feeling. The first color that comes to mind is the one that represents your anxiety. If a color doesn’t appear for you, then pick a color you don’t like much.

Now remember what it feels like when you are calm and quickly associate a color with calmness. Again, the first color that comes to mind is the one that represents being calm. If a color doesn’t come to you, then pick a color that you like.

With these two colors in your mind’s eye begin to take in slow and deep breaths that fill your lungs all the way down to your abdomen.

Breathe in the color that represents calm through your nose. Breathe out the color that represents anxiety through your mouth. You can imagine the air you breathe in and out is the color or you can think about the color as you breathe in and out.

If possible close your eyes. On the exhale feel your body relaxing into the chair, sofa or bed. If standing, feel your feet connecting with the floor or ground that supports you.

Continue to breathe in your color of calmness through your nose and to breathe out your color of anxiety through your mouth. Eventually you will no longer feel anxious and begin to feel calm. quiet and grounded. When this happens you may notice that you are now breathing your calm color on the intake breath as well as on the out breath.

When you repeat this exercise at different times you may notice that your colors representing anxiety and calmness change. This, of course, is OK and choosing to use the same colors again is OK too.

Sincerely sending you Peace & Love,

Tricia